If I didn't believe that people's spirits stayed with us in some way, shape, or form before Beth's passing, I certainly do now.
The day of Beth's wake, which I could not attend due to contractual obligations for a production I was in, I kept receiving signs she was with me.
The first sign I got was inside a book Beth gave me for my high school graduation. It was a coffee table book: 125 Years of Broadway. I remember the book and even used it in college as a reference for research papers. What I never realized is Beth wrote a message to me in that book. Blue ink on blue paper. It took 18 years for me to see that message. I believe I saw the message when I was SUPPOSED to.
Seeing this reminded me of how much Beth believed in me and how she was always and will always be one of my biggest cheerleaders. I graduated High School in 1993 - 2003 has come and gone - and I can tell you I was NOT on the cover of any book, but I didn't become a professional actress until 2008 so I have until 2018 to get myself on the cover of a book. :) I'm working on it, Beth!
Every day I think of her and I miss her so much. This evening while driving home from Pride in the Park in Allentown (a wonderful community gathering of love) I was thinking of her. Just as my eyes watered a song came on the radio which reminded me of her "Shuffle Off to Buffalo" from 42nd Street (Beth was a bad-ass tapping diva!) and I stared at my XM box in complete shock. As I lifted my eyes I saw a hawk sitting atop a disabled vehicle on the side of the road. During Beth's last week and the week of her services, there were many sightings of hawks by those closest to her. They have become a loving reminder of her anytime one of us sees one.
Even though she is not here with me in the flesh, I know she is an angel on my shoulder. When people close to us pass on we ask a lot of questions to which we will never know the answers. For me, starting Star of the Day Event Productions answers an unspoken question. It lies in my heart and soul and I know I'm doing the right thing.
Until we meet again, Bethie Poo!